brooke schwab


I recently stumbled on the beautiful photography of Brooke Schwab and my first thought was, “why doesn’t she live closer!??!”  I love her work, especially from these mini sessions.  all that white space, all those happy kids! {I even spy sweet Ory!}

pssst – in case you missed it, I shared a few tips on taking photos of kids here.

{all photos by Brooke Schwab}



Wolf at 1 year

wolf 1 year

remember back when I was writing for Babble?  and I said I was going to post updates on Wolf at 4 months, 6 months, 9 months and 1 year?  well, that didn’t happen.  I started back to work and right around that same time my computer died, leaving me to only write when I had free time, which was almost never.  now, still not much “free time” but I wanted to write a few things down about Wolf at 1 year so that I never forget, even though he turned a year old almost a month ago!  here goes.

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my good/picky eater.


sigh… all of a sudden my once great eater will hardly eat anything, leaving mom frustrated and a bit drained.  he still eats a fair amount of pureed stuff which we’ve been constantly trying to ween him from but he has always had a tough time with certain consistencies of food.  therefore, he doesn’t like to chew a lot.  plus, his bottom two first molars are popping through so I’m wondering if that could be part of the not-wanting-to-chew culprit?  lately, he only prefers to feed himself but has no clue how to eat with the spoon yet.  {we try and each time it results in a gigantic mess – but I know he’ll eventually learn!}  I cut up things like blueberries, corn off the cob, beans, etc and put it into a little bowl and he LOVES to eat that way, but the second I try to feed him the same thing with a fork, he spits it out!  even *gasp* strawberries.

any thoughts, advice?




somebody had a first birthday


and he had the best time.

the days before Wolf’s party, we looked at the weather and cringed.  80% chance of rain + 16 mph winds = a recipe for yuckiness at an outdoor BBQ party in the park.  so at 10am the day of the party, we canned plan A and moved on to plan B: an indoor pizza party.  I still made Wolf his birthday cupcakes and all of our guests still wore stripes.  we sipped our sodas from stripey straws and chowed down on all you can eat pizza.  we giggled and watched as Wolf ate his cupcake. when his hands got too sticky, he simply smashed his whole face into it.  he unwrapped every present by himself {mostly} and got “big excited face” when he unearthed each toy.  he was an absolute delight the entire time and even took a rare second nap he was so worn out!

striped family

I learned a big parent lesson, too.  when things don’t go as planned, you must must must make the best of it.  of course I had visions of beautiful, sunny photos of the set up and pictures of all our striped guests but you know, it just didn’t happen.  and yes, I was terribly bummed when we had to move the party indoors. {and even more bummed once I had a 4am realization that I’d had the settings wrong on my film camera and most likely underexposed ALL the photos I took at the party}  but I told myself, there might be other parties that get rained out or other things that just don’t go as planned.  and rather than being upset, I need to be happy, if not happier than Wolf so that he’s as happy as a clam when we move on to plan B.

happy birthday, Wolf.  congrats on your first trip around the sun.  here’s to many more.



to be a mother


when I was pregnant with Wolf, I knew I was madly in love with the baby inside of me.  I was SO anxious to meet him, to feel his tiny hands and kiss his sweet head.  I felt like, the second that he’d be born, I’d get butterflies in my stomach because I loved him so much, my body would swell over with indescribable emotion and that my head would virtually explode from all the love I had for him.  but to my surprise, after we brought our tiny new baby home from the hospital, it didn’t.

ok, step back a second.  yes, when Wolf was born, stars and moon beams were shooting out of my eyeballs and I could not believe that this tiny person was mine and we had created him.  I couldn’t believe that I’d given birth to him and there he was, outside my body, tiny and pink and impossibly cute.  I loved him.  but in the beginning, the hard outweighed the love and for me, love didn’t feel like it came easy.

there were nights when I’d cry because I was struggling so hard with breastfeeding or I was just plain tired.  I’d tell Levi that I wasn’t sure if I could do this, to be a good mother.  and I’d just continue to make myself more and more upset.  he’d assure me over and over again that things would get easier and indeed, they did.  I got into the swing of things and my heart started to burst with love a little more each day.

I’m writing this because I know that there are others out there like me, for whom motherhood didn’t come easy.  I always pictured myself as a mother but I never had baby fever and never dreamt of having babies.  I’d never even held a baby before Wolf was born.  but I’ve been thinking a lot about motherhood these past few days and I can’t imagine my life any other way.  I’m so dang proud of Wolf.  every day he makes me smile and laugh and just watching him learning new tasks makes my heart explode.

so the love is there.  and it’s been there all along.  it just took my body a little while to get adjusted to my new role of Mom.

p.s.  I love you Mom, more than you know.